Homies
07/4/2008We didn’t head out to Indiana Beach. Instead we waited until a little after 10pm and went shopping. We needed to pick up some essentials like milk and bread and shit like that and Meijer seemed like a good choice. It was a weird mix of people for a Thursday around 11pm.
Anyway, our Meijer has a junk aisle. Well, I call it the junk aisle. It’s one aisle between the outdoor stuff and the toys that just has junk. It’s tons of outdated, oddball, damaged and discountinued items marked way down hoping to pawn the crap off on the masses. Some things you’ll find in the junk aisle include CO2 cartridges (whippets!), tons of blank VHS-C tapes, a damaged box of vaginal itch cream (the tube inside is intact though), random hair products of various ages and conditions, open box coffee makers, a set of cookware that is clearly a return because no one has bothered to remove all the wrapping paper from one side of the box where it was taped on – things like that.
We always take a look in the junk aisle and tonight was no exception.
Tonight I scored. There was a pile of children’s valentines boxes. Not a bunch, but more than a handful – maybe 20 or 25 boxes. A bunch of Pirates of the Carribean, a few High School Musical, even a Power Rangers or two in the mix. I was just sorting through them looking for a winner and I joked that we needed to buy a box and send valentines to everyone in July. Next thing I knew, I had found it. I had to buy them – the only ones in the whole bunch:


Homies valentines! For 12 cents!! How could I not buy them? What the fuck are homies and who would buy this crap? Valentines featuring generic pseudo-urban characters? For 12 cents!? Sign me up.
Now I’m not sure whether to keep them forever boxed – my 12 cent treasure or to send them to people. Because, face it, receiving a Homies valentine in mid-July would be pretty awesome.
I have them sitting here on my desk staring at me. We’ll be up surfing the net tonight, just me and my homies.


