Tyler linked to this neat little device and all I could do was get a little misty-eyed at the prospect of buying weed with a credit card*.
The future is here, man.
*notice I didn’t say, “my credit card.”
Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste.
The bouquet of flowers my daughter got for Valentine’s Day (the one that put the cute little roses I got my wife to shame) are on the table in the entry. That means as I type this, they’re about 15 feet behind me over my left shoulder.
Something must be fucked up with my senses or at least my sense of smell because for some reason the scent the lillies puts off kind of smells like lillies sometimes, but if I catch it just right, it kinda smells like hot dog water and it’s making me a little nauseous. Some serious wires getting crossed in my head – too many drugs. At least I’m not hearing colors…yet.
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*not to worry about the bouquet for my daughter, it’s not a boy – it’s a tradition from Aunt Rebecca
Every time we get snow, my wife has to deal with people not coming to work. The thing is she’s the big bosswoman and has to make sure shit gets done – so when someone calls off and no one can (or will) cover…it’s up to her and her management team (and others willing to step up) to make it happen.
So the last two days we had snow…and ice.
People started calling off before it even began based solely on weather reports of it coming. More people after it started falling and even more today in the aftermath and cleanup phase.
So my wife and some of the managers are forced to do crazy shit like sleep at the hotel or work 16 hours or get up at 4am and head in to do stuff like serving food or cleaning rooms or taking reservations.
Big deal, they’re the bosses that’s why they get paid what they get paid, right?
Well, sort of. But a lot of people (mostly the kind of people that don’t make any extra effort – like showing up when they call for snow) don’t seem to put the whole process on the table.
Maybe that willingness to come in and pick up the slack is why these people became managers and achieved higher salaries? In fact, I’m 99% sure it is.
The kind of people who do things like that are the kind that become managers with big salaries. The kind who aren’t don’t.
And the funny thing is that those that don’t, don’t seem to get it at all. And when Friday rolls around and those people who came in an worked 16 hour days and slept at their place of employment to make sure they’d be there and things would be taken care of take a three day weekend, you know what the “people who don’t” are all going to say to each other?
“Must be nice to be the boss and take a three day weekend whenever you want.”
People are so predictable.
Note: “people that don’t” also usually complain about how they keep getting screwed in life and how they never get a break or a raise or recognition or anything and can’t understand why others do
From Carrie:
Do you have to put a winkie face after your sentences in order to prove you are joking? Have you noticed how many times that occurs? I have been making it a point not to winkify my sentiments lately. I’ve decided that based on principle I shouldn’t have to add any level of winkness to my sentences in order to make a point.
Have you ever noticed how many people post really digging or sarcastic things, too, but make it all better by adding the winkie? It’s as if the winkie has some kind of pacifying power. “How can you take offense to me…didn’t you see my winkie?” How does that even work?
I don’t get it. I for one prefer to be winkless for the time being.
Good stuff. Except it’d have been 36% funnier to use “winkieless” instead of “winkless” at the end.
I’m guilty of winkie overuse. However, much of the time it’s not meant to smooth over a scathing comment, but rather reinforce the assholiness* of it…like an exclamation point that’s made of 100% cocky. Consider it almost ironic use of the winkie. A lot of times, if I’m ripping you and I end it with a winkie then I’m just being a dick at that point.
There are times when it is meant to signify a playfulness that might not be readily apparent by words alone. (I find that conversational communication via typed word is extremely limiting) Although, I find that I tend to use the smiley more for that.
The winkie also comes into play when something is blatantly meant to be a joke or silly. Just to let you know that I know I’m being a dork.
I find the winkie can be very versatile and I love to play with my winkie as much as possible. ;)
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*when the pope is an asshole you address him with this title (e.g. “Your Assholiness”)
Copyright © 2012 Lord Gonchar