footnotes - Lord Gonchar

Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste.

Dig Through This Site

Roller Coaster Pictures

My Neck Of The Woods

The Shit I Listen To

10 Facts About Lord Gonchar

10 Facts About Lord Gonchar*

1. Some kids piss their name in the snow. Lord Gonchar can piss his into concrete.

2. Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Lord Gonchar can kill 100 percent of whatever the fuck he wants.

3. Lord Gonchar’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Lord Gonchar.

4. Lord Gonchar counted to infinity – twice.

5. Lord Gonchar’s tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

6. Lord Gonchar can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

7. Lord Gonchar was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.

8. Superman owns a pair of Lord Gonchar pajamas.

9. If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Lord Gonchar says its beef, then it’s fucking beef.

10. Lord Gonchar once won a game of poker holding just a Joker, a Get Out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game Uno.

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*Not only do I still find great amusement in the old ‘Chuck Norris Facts’ thing, I find them even more amusing if I put Lord Gonchar in the place of Chuck Norris.

Weekend Home

Went home for the weekend to see the family and take care of some stuff. Some highlights and lowlights:

1. The HHR is averaging just shy of 30mpg up to this point.
2. I could’ve totally taken home the 60-something lady sitting beside me at the wedding reception…she wanted me.
3. Finally saw the Angus burger at McDonald’s – meh.
4. Stopping by Grandma’s.
5. Ring Bologna from Miller’s. Mmmm…old-school.
6. Driving by the house I grew up in and the whole neighborhood seeming smaller and crummier than I remember.
7. The unexplained light*
8. “You’ve been Skunked!”
9. Running over a squirrel. (I didn’t mean to…fucking suicidal squirrel)
10. Scoring karma points for hooking up the dude at the rest stop with directions.

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* Along this stretch of 38 at about 10:30 at night. I was driving and my mother was the only other one in the car. We’re blowing up that road at about 70 and I noticed a really bright light gaining on us quick. Mentioned it to mom as the 70 I was doing was too fast for that road and this catching up fast. We watched as a single rectangular light centered in the lane caught quickly up to us and stayed right on my ass. We spent a moment wondering what the hell it was as there were no other lights – just one very bright, white, rectangular light centered behind us – at first we thought it was a motor cycle, but it made no noise catching up to us and a bike winding out at that speed would’ve been loud. The light was so bright that I joked that I could’ve turned my lights off and still seen just fine. We wondered for another moment what it was. Truck with a headlight out, quiet motorcycle…

…then it just vanished. Gone. Nothing at all behind us.

We pondered for a second whether it turned onto Hohn Rd (see map), but it was still right on the ass-end of the HHR when it disappeared. That turn is from a two-lane road to an even smaller two-lane road at more than a 90 degree angle – no way any vehicle could’ve taken that at 70mph and if it slowed and turned we’d have seen it. It was just gone. In that 1.5 mile span the weird-ass light caught up to me doing 70, rode our ass for like 30 seconds and fucking evaporated. It was weird.

October 15th, 2007 - footnotes - personal - weird

Chocolate Rain Redeux

I told you I couldn’t get this damn song outta my head! I had to do something about it and the only logical answer was to dive head in and listen to it so much that I became immune. What better way to force yourself to repeatedly listen to something than to add your own music under it. (remix?)

Here’s what I wasted the last two hours of my life on:

Chocolate Rain (LG Redeux)

So should I sync it up to the video and add it as a reply on YouTube or just leave well enough alone and hope it’s finally out of my system?

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*This is the first music thing I’ve done in quite a while that wasn’t meant to eventually be a tune for some coaster video

August 7th, 2007 - entertainment - footnotes - geek - music - nerd - random

84th Best Place To Live

Every year money magazine dows a list of the best places to live. The list can get quite redundant so they often mix it up a little. This year they’re covering the 100 best small-ish towns and cities to live. Or in their words:

For this year’s list we focused on smaller places that offered the best combination of economic opportunity, good schools, safe streets, things to do and a real sense of community.

So this year it’s official – we live in the 84th best place in the country.

Yup, I’m living it…

…sigh.

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*Note: this is a repost of one lost in the meltdown from last week.

August 4th, 2007 - footnotes - home - random

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